At Sonshine
Patch Christian Preschool, we use the Love and Logic approach to guidance
for young children. We also offer Love and Logic parenting classes
during the school year. We have many books and C.D.s in our parent
library to check out to enhance your parenting experience. Watch your
newsletter and this website for dates and times or you may email me for
information. If you are interested in a class for your school, parent
group or church, please call or email me.
Biblical Analogies to Love and Logic Philosophy
Though I am sure there are
many more, the following are analogies I have observed between the“Love and
Logic” parenting philosophy and biblical teachings. As a Christian, this
reassures me that Love and Logic not only reinforces Christian teachings,
but also does not contradict them as many parenting philosophies do. This
is one of the reasons I so highly endorse Love and Logic and have chosen to
become a Love and Logic facilitator.
Love and Logic teaches that children need to make lots of
choices.
When God created man, He gave him free will to make his own choices.
Genesis 2:16 “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must
not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.”
Joshua 24:15 “Then choose for yourselves this day who you will serve..as
for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”
Love and Logic teaches that children need to be allowed to
make lots of mistakes when the ‘price’ is small so they will make less
mistakes when the price is large. (i.e. skinning a knee on triangle vs.
crashing a car)
Proverbs 8:10 “Choose my instruction
instead of silver; knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more
precious than rubies and nothing you desire can compare with her.”
Hebrews 4:15 “For we do not have a high priest (Jesus) who is unable to
sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in
every way, just as we are-yet was without sin. Let us then approach the
throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace
to help others in their time of need.”
Love and Logic teaches that allowing children to solve the
problems they have created (with guidance) gives them a sense of
accomplishment through struggle.
James 1:1 “Consider it pure joy, my
brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the
testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its
work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
Love and Logic teaches that through chores children gain a
sense of importance and belonging in the family.
2 Thessalonian 3:6-10 “In the name of
the Lord Jesus Christ we command you brothers to keep away from every
brother who is idle and does not live according to the teaching you received
from us….
For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule, “If a man will not
work, he shall not eat.”
Proverbs 10:4 “Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth.”
Love and Logic teaches that after a child has experienced
the consequences or discipline for his actions, we do not lecture or scold,
but lovingly hug, encourage and welcome him back into the family activities.
After discipline/repentance, God lovingly welcomes us back in His arms.
Psalms 103:9,12 “He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger
forever…as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our
transgressions from us.”
Isaiah 40:11 “He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in
his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that
have young.”
Though it is difficult and painful for us as parents to
watch our children struggle, Love and Logic teaches that wisdom comes
through suffering and working through problems.
God grieves when man sins (and makes bad choices). It must be difficult and
painful for Him to see His beloved children fall.
Matthew 23:37 “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone
those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together,
as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing.”
Love and Logic teaches children to be respectful and
obedient as a result of loving and firm guidance.
God commands children to obey and honor their parents.
Ephesians 6:1-2 “Children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right.
Honor your father and mother.”
Love and Logic teaches that children who experience
logical consequences learn they are in charge of their own destiny.
God allows natural consequences to
help man learn from his bad choices
Proverbs 12:1 “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, bu he who hates
correction is stupid.”
When our kids do something that affects us directly-lose
our tools, fail to put our things away after using them, etc., it’s okay for
us to ‘do something’ about it. If we are angry, Love and Logic teaches that
a “delayed consequence” can be very appropriate, until our emotions are
calmer.
Sometimes God disciplines us by “doing
something” to help us learn from our mistakes.
Jeremiah 21:14 I will punish you as your deeds deserve, declares the Lord.
Love and Logic teaches, we are to discipline our children
in love, never as vengeful, punitive or demeaning. The goal is to prepare
them to become responsible adults in the ‘real world’ someday.
In all cases, God disciplines man out
of LOVE for His dear children wanting them to grow to become righteous
children of God and to some day dwell in the kingdom of Heaven.
1Thessalonians 2:11 For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father
deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting and urging you to live
lives worthy of God.
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers do not
exasperate your children.
Colossians 3: 21 Children obey your parents in everything, for this pleases
the Lord. Fathers do not embitter your children or they will become
discouraged.
Love and Logic tells us to set limits. Limits help
children to feel loved and safe.
God set limits and boundaries for man,
first through the law and the 10 commandments, and then by commanding us to
live following the example of His Son, Jesus Christ.
Proverbs 29:17 “Discipline your son and he will give you peace; he will
bring delight to your soul.”
Love and Logic teaches that passing on values to our
children is best done by example, by what they see and by what they
experience in relating to us as parents.
Jesus life on this earth was an example and a model for man to follow to
live a righteous life
Titus 2:6-7 “Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In
everything set them an example by doing what is good”
Philippians 2:4-5 “Each of you should look not only to your own interests
but also to the interests of others your attitudes should be the same as
that of Christ Jesus.”
Love and Logic teaches that anger directs children to
focus on the adult’s anger, while empathy teaches children to look at their
lives and their decisions.
James 1:19 “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to
become angry.”
Ephesians 4:26 “In your anger do not
sin.”
1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear,
because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made
perfect in love.”
Love and Logic teaches that the more word you use, the
less effective they become.
Matthew 5:37 “Simply let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes’ and your ‘no’, ‘no’.”
Exodus 3:14 “God said to Moses, ‘I AM who I AM. This is what you are to say
to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you’.”
Love and Logic teaches that if we protect our children
from mistakes, rescue them from consequences, set no limits, and do their
thinking for them, we are training them to be unprepared for the real world.
1Thessalonians 3:13 “And as for you, brothers, never
tire of doing what is right.”
Hebrews 12:7-13 “Endure hardship as discipline. God is treating you as
sons”
Mark 8:35-36 “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it , but whoever
loses his life for me and for the gospel will save it”
Love and Logic teaches us to use enforceable statements
that involve thinking words, not fighting words.
Matthew 12:36 “But I tell you that men
will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless world
they have spoken.”
Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up
anger.”
Often we may feel “It is easier if I just do it myself” or
“I just don’t want to argue with him/her; I’ll just let him do what he/she
wants.
But God tells us to persevere. We will be held accountable for the
parenting we do of the precious children He has gifted to us.
Hebrews 12: 1 “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of
witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so
easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for
us.”
Romans 14:12 “So then each of us will give an account of himself to the
Lord.”
Matthew 7:13 “Enter through the narrow
gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction,
and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that
leads to life, and only a few find it.”
To connect to the Love and Logic website, click on the
logo.
The following are frequently asked questions and
answers from the Love and Logic website.
What is Love and
Logic?
Love and Logic is a
philosophy of raising and teaching children which allows adults to be
happier, empowered, and more skilled in the interactions with children. Love
allows children to grow through their mistakes. Logic allows children to
live with the consequences of their choices. Love and Logic is a way of
working with children that puts parents and teachers back in control,
teaches children to be responsible, and prepares young people to live in the
real world, with its many choices and consequences.
Who can benefit
from Love and Logic?
Almost anyone will
benefit from the Love and Logic approach. Our products especially help
parents and teachers enjoy working with children through easy-to-use
techniques. The Love and Logic approach helps children develop and grow in a
healthy way, provides them with confidence and dignity, and teaches them how
to become more responsible. The possibilities are limitless.
How is Love and
Logic different from other approaches?
Love and Logic offers
adults an alternative way to communicate with children. The Love and Logic
techniques produce immediate results because the techniques are simple,
practical, and easy to learn. The concepts behind Love and Logic place a
heavy emphasis on respect and dignity for children and at the same time
allows parents to grasp simple approaches instead of learning difficult
counseling procedures.
The following articles are from the Love and Logic website and were written
by Dr. Charles Fay or Jim Fay. Click on any article to read it. New
articles are continually added to the Love and Logic site so for more
information, click on the Love and Logic Logo
Teach Your Kids to Handle Life's Conflicts
Make Your Kids Responsible for Their Actions
Parents Can Reduce Stress This Holiday Season by Giving the Gift of Time
Making the Internet Safer For Your Kids
End Childhood Swearing
You Can Save Your Child's Life
Tight Financial Times Can Bring Families Together
What’s More Important: GPA or Character?
Holidays Mean More Than Heartburn
Please Spare the Silver Spoon
Manners Matter!
If Kids Can Hear Promises, They Can Hear Requests
Give Your Children the Values They Deserve
Have a Plan for Dealing With Peer Pressure
Teenagers and Spring Fever
Keep Teenagers Safe Behind the Wheel
Prom: A Night of Many Decisions for Teens
No More Homework Battles
Make It Mom’s Day All Year Round
End the Bedtime Blues
Every Dad Can Be a Hero
My Parent Is So Smart
Battling the Back-to-School Blues
Raising Patriotic Kids
They’ll Love You for Holding Them Accountable
Start School With a Smile
School Success Starts Early
Tantrum-Free Shopping With Your Kids Starts Early
Parents Can Help Kids Cope With Tragedy
"My Teacher is Mean!"
Don't Work Harder Than Your Child!
Making Divorce Less Traumatic for Kids
"Big Kids Do It in the Potty"… and Other Adventures
National Parenting Survey Results
A Public
Perspective on Parenting, Overview & Highlights
A Quick Read of the Survey Results (pdf 112k)
Free Weekly Email Tip from Love and Logic
Click Here
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